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Work, life and things in between – Day 20: I am an empty nester!

Work, life and things in between – Day 20: I am an empty nester!

I take the 4 pm flight back from Kelowna to Vancouver. Even though no one is waiting for me at the condo, it is a thrill for me to walk in.  Upsides of being an empty nester? There is actually food in the refrigerator when you return, the laundry basket remained empty while you were away AND the place is still tidy. A novelty!

As soon as I am done unpacking, I call Mom. Religiously I call my mother at least once a week. Because my dad is hard of hearing at times, I exchange with him over the net.  He has picked up web based communication and this is a wonderful way to stay in touch with him.

Here is a man who faced change head on.  To pick up computer literacy at 88 when even the IBM Selectric did not exist when you were still at work, is nothing short of spectacular.

My Mom, she still wants to talk.  She wants to know how Anne is doing (my sister), how the week- end went, etc.

I am beginning to understand that with age, as a parent, nothing warms your heart more than the realization that your children continue to be siblings, to visit and enjoy each other’s company and care for each other even once they have established their own individual lives.  To a parent this is a whole load of satisfaction, tender thoughts and a great sense of accomplishment.

So, tonight, we are warming her heart.  I know that. Not much equates the feeling of bringing joy to your loved ones.

My Mom and Dad are both eighty-nine (89) years old this year.  They met, were engaged and married within six months of first laying eyes on each other. Ten (10) months later, the first of their four children was born. It was love at first sight and today, sixty-three (63) years later, they still celebrate their wedding anniversary.

Their children on the other hand have all failed at their marriages.  All four of us. Go figure!  It is not as if we did not know how it should work…It is simply that we could not make it work I guess.

As my daughter so wisely said when I was agonizing over the fact that her father and I failed to give them a road map for happy marriage: “Mom, don’t sweat it! It will be easier for us.  Where you had a pattern to follow, we will be free to make it anyway we want.  We don’t have to try to color within the lines….there are no lines! it will be easier for us than it was for you”.

You gotta love her!

How liberating is this?  Years of agonizing over failing at providing a sample of family life for my children, and she whips up this answer as she maneuvers her way through traffic.  Swell! presented that way it appears that one of my greatest life crisis suddenly went from a hurricane status to a breeze.

Amazing what you uncover when you actually talk things over.  To think that all these years I was afraid to bring it up. Whatever. To day 21.

 I take the 4 pm flight back from Kelowna to Vancouver. Even though no one is waiting for me at the condo, it is a thrill for me to walk in.  Upsides of being an empty nester? There is actually food in the refrigerator when you return, the laundry basket remained empty and the place is still tidy. A novelty!

As soon as I am done unpacking, I call Mom. Religiously I call my mother at least once a week. Because my dad is hard of hearing at times, I exchange with him over the net.  He has picked up web based communication and this is a wonderful way to stay in touch with him.  But my mom, she still wants to talk.  She wants to know how Anne is doing (my sister), how the week- end went, etc.

I am beginning to understand that with age, as a parent, nothing warms your heart more than the realization that your children continue to be siblings, to visit and enjoy each other’s company and care for each other even once they have established their own individual lives.  To a parent this is a whole load of satisfaction, tender thoughts and a great sense of accomplishment.

So, tonight, I am warming her heart.  I know that. Not much equates the feeling of bringing joy to your loved ones.

My Mom and Dad are both eighty-nine (89) years old this year.  They met, were engaged and married within six months of first laying eyes on each other. Ten (10) months later, the first of their four children was born. It was love at first sight and today, sixty-three (63) years later, they still celebrate their wedding anniversary.

Their children on the other hand have all failed at their marriages.  All four of us. Go figure!  It is not as if we did not know how it should work…It is simply that we could not make it work I guess.

As my daughter so wisely said when I was agonizing over the fact that her father and I failed to give them a road map for happy marriage: “Mom, don’t sweat it! It will be easier for us.  Where you had a pattern to follow, we will be free to make it anyway we want.  We don’t have to try to color within the lines….there are no lines! it will be easier for us than it was for you”.

You gotta love her!

How liberating is this?  Years of agonizing over failing at providing a sample of family life for my children, and she whips up this answer as she maneuvers her way through traffic.  Swell! presented that way it appears that one of my greatest life crisis suddenly went from a hurricane status to a breeze.  Whatever. To day 21.